Anyone who has ever watched a daytime talk show knows it can be painful to confront longstanding suspicions about paternity. But these questions can creep up for many individuals in a variety of circumstances.
Below are three signs you can look for if you are suspicious of the family bonds that you’ve grown up with.
1. Physical & Personality Traits
Your physical features, and to some extent your personality traits, are a direct result of the DNA you’ve inherited from your parents. So it should come as no surprise that these are often the first clues people recognize in cases of paternal misidentification.
Of course, this is not a sure-fire test. Many people simply resemble their biological mother. In addition, it’s possible to inherit a pair of recessive genes for features that neither biological parent outwardly manifests. A classic example of this is a blue-eyed child being born to brown-eyed parents.
Nevertheless, if you find that you have absolutely no resemblance to the man you believe to be your biological father, it could be enough of a red flag to take more conclusive actions.
2. Inconsistent Timetables
Many people have been able to confirm their fears about questionable paternal lineage through inconsistent or impossible timelines regarding conception.
The most common example of this is inconsistencies between physical presence and the gestation period. For example, if you find out later in life that the man you believe to be your father was actually stationed on a military base or traveling nine months before you were born, it should raise some doubts.
3. A Lack of Love & Attention
Even if they aren’t consciously aware of any deception, it’s nonetheless very common for males to have a “sixth sense” about whether or not a child is actually theirs. No one is quite sure why this is the case. However, the idea is corroborated by the fact that the inverse is also true – parents and siblings will often feel an instant sense of deep connection when reunited after a lifetime of separation.
So, if you are perplexed as to why your father figure showered siblings with love and attention while treating you with indifference or even disdain, it’s a possible sign that he isn’t your biological father.
4. The Direct (And Real) Way to Know Is a DNA Paternity Test
Though the above signs might be justifiable reasons to question the family narratives you’ve grown up with, remember that they are not definitive proof. For that, you will need to undergo a DNA paternity test and compare your genes to those of the man you believe(d) to be your father.
If you are ready to know the truth, services such as HomeDNA can provide you with an accurate, affordable home DNA test kit that will get you the answers you deserve.
5. The Indirect Way to Know Is a DNA Ancestry Test
In order to know for sure, you would need to get the consent of the alleged father. Sometimes this consent and cooperation is challenging, if not impossible (in the case that he is estranged or deceased). In this case, you can take the indirect approach.
The indirect approach is quite simple to execute, thus, it is based mainly on “luck”. Basically, you test your DNA using an ordinary home DNA test for Ancestry kit. The results of the DNA test will be cross-referenced to a family tree (a feature that is commonly included in most of the DNA testing services). This way, you can trace your distant family members and determine whether your alleged father has blood ties to you or not.
The most biggest problem with this approach is that in order to get the results you’re looking for, the database of the DNA testing service must include samples from your family.